We’ve all heard horror stories about relatives passing away who have left loved ones and beneficiaries with a mess to unravel because they were less than organized. And you might be one of the (probably few) people out there who are smugly feeling like this won’t apply to you because your parents are super organized, you know where everything is, and you’re positive that the road to your inheritance will be smooth.
To that I say, “Congratulations.”
I also say, “Hang on.”
As someone who has lost two very organized parents in the last five years, I can tell you that I was very grateful for everything they had in place.
I can also tell you that I was somewhat surprised at how long it still took to get everything ironed out. Here were a few things that took me by surprise.
The Car
Oh, that damn car! My parents were so organized and had put everything into a trust to avoid probate and make everything clear – except my mother’s car.
My mom had moved states to be near my sisters and me just several months before she died, and she had not yet updated her car tags, which I didn’t know. The car was not in the trust (meaning she owned it personally), which meant we had to get the will involved.
Bottom line: It is so crucial to make sure that everything is up-to-date, which I know your parents probably don’t want to deal with every time they make a major purchase, so you might have to get involved and at least remind them. In our case, it took three trips to the DMV (including all the time it took to get an appointment) in two different counties and then five trips to the local branch of SellACarUSA.com to get this done.
Believe me, you don’t want to deal with that while you’re grieving.
Tax Returns
My mom passed in March before taxes were due for the prior year, and then we had to file taxes for the year in which she passed. We had to keep everything open until we were sure she had paid all her taxes more than a year after her death.
This is likely not something you can avoid – I just want to make you aware that this takes some time, even when everything is in place.
The Devil is in the Details
Even with a trust and everything prepped and discussed, getting everything settled still took a long time. Even though I personally was managing my mom’s money, there are still processes in place that take a while. Death certificates need to be sent, signatures need to be verified, documents need to be notarized – and no one else is in as much of a hurry as you are.
Here’s the thing. If you’re a Gen X woman, you’re probably going to be dealing with this at some point in the next 5, 10, or 15 years. A lot of money is projected to change hands during the Great Wealth Transfer, and you need to be prepared.
However, it’s also important to remember that even if everything is in place, sifting through it all takes time. Do what you can to have professionals lined up to help you if needed, have ongoing conversations with your parents, and ask questions now before you’re dealing with a mess later.
And if you’re looking for someone who has helped a lot of clients and has been through it personally…I’m here to help.
MORE RESOURCES:
Money & Aging: A Checklist of Topics to Discuss with Your Parents
Plan Ahead: How to Have Conversations About Money & Health with Aging Parents
Should You Count on an Inheritance as Part of Your Retirement Plan?
